The Answering Machine vs Drunk Sarah
by AwesomeMJay
Summary: Casey's answering machine has met it's match... T Rated.


**Author's Notes: **So what happened that night caused an assault on answering machines, namely Casey's. Please read and review! Enjoy :3

**The Answering Machine vs Drunk Sarah**

**You have sixteen new messages**

**Message One**

"Hey Casey it's Chuck, you know Chuck Bartowski? I live next door to you... The reason I'm calling is-"

"MAIGGGHHHTTTTYYYYY!"

"That. Do you know how exactly... ermm... how to put this-"

"Chook! Are we going to-"

To delete this message press one, to repeat this message press two, to save this message press three.

You have pressed one. This message has been deleted.

**Message Two**

"Hey Casey, it's me. Again. You know Chuck? Anyway sorry the last call got cut off Sarah was insistent that I make her another drink and-"

"Chook!"

"Ok she's calling me again which is bad. _Very bad. _Do you know how Sarah copes with alcohol?"

"Chook give me the phone!"

"Sarah this is a very important call-"

"Not as impo-implor-high pieortity as me-"

To delete this message press one, to repeat this message press two, to save this message press three.

You have pressed one. This message has been deleted.

**Message Three**

"Hey Casey your phone is off... Still. And-"

"You're on that phone again!"

"Sarah I kind of have to-"

"Give it to me!"

"I don't think that's a-"

"I'll bite you."

To delete this message press one, to repeat this message press two, to save this message press three.

You have pressed one. This message has been deleted.

**Message Four**

"Why is your phone off? You may wonder why I'm whispering but Sarah gets annoyed without alcohol, it turns out she takes alcohol pretty badly. I fear for the intersec-"

"Is that the phone again?"

To delete this message press one, to repeat this message press two, to save this message press three.

You have pressed one. This message has been deleted.

**Message Five**

"It's me again I need help here now Sarah is threatening to-"

To delete this message press one, to repeat this message press two, to save this message press three.

You have pressed one. This message has been deleted.

**Message Six**

"Casey... Or would you prefer John... _Sugarbear?"_

"Sarah are you calling Case-"

"If you didn't know this already I'm Sarah but you can call me Dr Evil. As I have a cat-"

To delete this message press one, to repeat this message press two, to save this message press three.

You have pressed one. This message has been deleted.

**Message Seven**

"Sowweee John, Chook disconnected me but I was wondering if I peeled an orange and a monkey came out of it and started dancing with Ronald Regan and decided to fight with George Bush would Bigfoot exist?"

"Sarah stop bothering Casey-"

"We should start a petition to bring Bigfoot out of hiding and-"

"Sarah you're drunk-"

"Drunk enough for sex?"

To delete this message press one, to repeat this message press two, to save this message press three.

You have pressed one. This message has been deleted.

**Message Eight**

"Sorry I hung up! It was bad-"

"You mean rude?"

"Casey's Rudolph?"

To delete this message press one, to repeat this message press two, to save this message press three.

You have pressed one. This message has been deleted.

**Message Nine**

"Hey Casey it's Chuck, sorry about Sarah she just seems to be very insistent when she's drunk but right now she thinks she's drinking an alcoholic beverage but it's orange juice so it should be-"

"HEY! THIS IS ORANGE JUICE!"

"Oh no."

"CHOOK!"

To delete this message press one, to repeat this message press two, to save this message press three.

You have pressed one. This message has been deleted.

**Message Ten**

"It's me again! I was wondering if Penguins wear bandanas in the wild if Giraffes were two feet high? Oh this is still Sarah."

"Sarah please hang up the phone-"

"One minute! Who would win out of a badger and a skunk if the badger had gloves and the skunk had a spoon?"

"Don't make me take it off you Sarah-"

"I like a man that takes control maybe if you did that in the bedroo-"

To delete this message press one, to repeat this message press two, to save this message press three.

You have pressed one. This message has been deleted.

**Message Eleven**

"About the skunk and badgers again. I decided we could breed them. Skunbadgers... Would we call them Bunks or Skadgers?"

To delete this message press one, to repeat this message press two, to save this message press three.

You have pressed one. This message has been deleted.

**Message Twelve**

"I found the answer! Skadgerbunks."

To delete this message press one, to repeat this message press two, to save this message press three.

You have pressed one. This message has been deleted.

**Message Thirteen**

"John? This is your mother. You should always answer my calls, I just got a call from someone called Sarah who claimed to know you, you should stay away from her. She sounds like the wrong crowd. She asked me if I would shove ipod headphones up my nose and open my mouth to see if I could become a human speaker, I don't know what an ipod is or-"

To delete this message press one, to repeat this message press two, to save this message press three.

You have pressed one. This message has been deleted.

**Message Fourteen**

"Your mother again, seems that your machine has cut me off. But stay away from Sarah, I think she's doing drugs."

To delete this message press one, to repeat this message press two, to save this message press three.

You have pressed one. This message has been deleted.

**Message Fifteen**

"CASEY! I know your mother and where you live be afraid-CHOOK! Get off! It's my phone!"

"It's for your own good!"

"Sex is for my-"

To delete this message press one, to repeat this message press two, to save this message press three.

You have pressed one. This message has been deleted.

**Message Sixteen**

"Hello John Casey? This is Melvin Hewitts, I've got that framed poster of Ronal Reagan ready for pick up on Wednesday, call me back please."

To delete this message press one, to repeat this message press two, to save this message press three.

You have pressed three. This message has been saved.


End file.
